Effects of Poor Parenting on Psychological Health.
August 10 2020 · 5 min read
A child is a student whose parents do not know they have. The one reading this is whether somebody's child or parent, hence has experienced parenting in one way or the other. Parenting is not only cooking good meals or reading storybooks to your child before bed: it is understanding the emotional needs of your child and not making them feel unwanted.
When children are in their growing age, they look at their mother and father as teachers. Though they do not say it out, they are adopting all the ways their parents’ act. You often have seen children mimicking their father or mother's actions. If the behavior of parents is appreciating they adopt that and if it is degrading they learn it accordingly. And major damage occurs when violence is a part of the environment at home. Children accept violence as a way to resolve their problems as they grow up. They learn bullying others is okay to release their frustration. If parents yell and beat them up for inappropriate behavior, low grades, or not fulfilling expectations, parents have lost control of the situation. Children will only fear the raised voice, but they can never have respect for parents. Besides, it gives rise to the communication gap between parents and their children. No matter what the children would be going through, they will prefer sharing it with friends over family, or they will go into depression hiding things within themselves.
Next comes the twin of violence that is as cancerous as violence itself; comparison. Though everyone is set on different development tables, parents usually compare their children to neighbor's children, cousins, and worst of all to their siblings. The comparison does not lead anywhere better. It only creates an inferiority complex in the child being compared. It makes them think that what they are is not wanted, that they are not loved. Such children grow up angry and sad. They do not have faith in themselves. They have low self-esteem and cannot act in the face of fear to try out new things.
There are a lot of healthy ways to raise children. One way is that parents can make vivid what they want from them. This will help children to have clear goals and act appropriately. Moreover, parents can appreciate all the little achievements of their children. In addition to making the children happy it makes them feel that what they do matters and is taken care of. Appreciation triggers them to do more next time. Along with that children feel like they have won a gold medal when parents are happy because of them. It provides them a sense of pride and they work harder to make it again and again. Another aspect parents need to look at is the way they talk to their children. Parents must have room to accept all the errors their children make. When children have done something inaccurately, blasting on them is not a solution; teaching them how the fault can be fixed or what works instead is. How would a father expect to be treated by his boss when he makes a mistake? He would never want his boss to rush into the office all of a sudden, scream at him, or talk in a raised voice. A father should treat his children in the same way of respect. This will create a win-win situation where parents and children can fit together.
To sum up, a parent should be flexible enough to allow his/her children to make mistakes, learn what does not work, and get mature. Brutality and rigidity of a parent only belittle children and they become unconfident in a milder way. It does more harm than good.